To babble or not to babble: Musings on Idols

(WINNERS: (Important things first: I decided to choose TWO winners, in honor of two sunny days in a row here in foggy San Francisco. My sister chose them from a sort of cyber-hat...and they are...

Ranurgis and Tammi!! Everyone say "yay!" for Ranurgis and Tammi! Send me your addresses, girls, and tell me whether you'd like a copy of THIEF or BATS.  And thanks to everyone who came by to chat—it was fun!!! Hope you come back and do it again!)

         A few years back I dragged some friends with me to the Great American Music Hall, a cool old mid-sized music venue with balconies and tables here in San Francisco, to see an afternoon show of a local band called the Movie Stars. The Movie Stars were sort of…well, an alternative country band, for lack of a better description. They were whimsical, they rocked a bit, they had accordions. Most importantly, they had a song called “Julie Anne,” which tickled me for probably obvious reasons.

         But when we got to the club, it turned out I’d gotten the day wrong: the Movie Stars weren’t playing. We were told another local band we’d never heard of, American Music Club, was playing, instead. We all milled about in indecision on the sidewalk outside for a time, and then finally, under the reproachful gazes of my friends—I mean, I'd dragged them all downtown, after all—I flipped a coin. Heads, and we would pay to see this band instead.

         Heads it was.

         And thus my life was changed by a coin toss.

         We ducked into the darkness of the club and once we got settled in at a good table in the back and had beers in front of us, I started watching this guy who was already standing on stage, twisting the mic stand upward to make it taller. Roadie, I mused absently. He looked like…well, someone’s Uncle Bob, I thought, slightly uncharitably but still amused with myself. Beetle-browed, dark-haired (thinning on top), slight. He was wearing a beige short-sleeved shirt that looked an awful lot like the top half of my uniform when I worked at Round Table pizza as a teenager.

         But when the band began filing out onstage, each of them casually settling in with their instruments—guitars, bass, keyboard, drums—Uncle Bob planted himself with some authority in front of the microphone. And then the music began to sort of swell up around him…lovely, interesting, promising music…and he opened his mouth to sing and—

         Every single hair on my body stood up. I stopped breathing.
         It was one of those moments. BAM. I knew instantly, instantly, before they’d played more than a few notes, that I would passionately love this band, this singer, this songwriter.

          This was my introduction to Mark Eitzel and American Music Club, the Godfathers of “Shoegazer rock,” their torch now carried by the likes of, oh, Coldplay and their ilk, probably. Their music was gorgeous, mostly mid-tempo, moody, but it was Eitzel's voice that got to me. It was an enormous, reckless thing, soft as scorched velvet one moment, stampeding the next. And the lyrics—he wrote them—were incredible: brilliant, biting, heartbreaking, funny. This short guy with the unibrow genuinely blew my mind. 

         I still played music at the time, and I now had a new idol.

         AMC enjoyed pockets of pure reverent, rabid, adulation in the Bay Area, across the country and the UK, and Mark Eitzel was voted songwriter of the year by Rolling Stone Magazine in 1992, and every now and then I get a delightful surprise when I’m listening to BBC 6 online (British alternative radio) and hear a song by them thrown into the mix. But American radio never seemed to know what to do with American Music Club, so they never really became widely known in the U.S. It wasn’t that they were exotic or inaccessible…just perhaps difficult to categorize.

         Anyway, they were local, and I went to almost all of their shows, and every now and then I saw Mark Eitzel in audiences at shows for other bands. And I once found myself standing right next to him in the audience at a show.

         And I didn’t say a thing.

         Now, I’m a little shy. People who’ve known me for a while simply don’t believe me when I say that, but it’s true. Which was part of the reason I clammed up, big time. But in a way, too…I wanted my icon to remain an icon. I liked having an icon—someone I admired from a distance, someone who represented something to aspire to. Who was more an ideal than a person.
         I think it was Bruce Springsteen who reflected about not necessarily wanting to meet Elvis Presley, because he was worried knowing him as a person might interfere with the pleasure he took in Elvis’s music. Still, now I wished I’d said something to Mark Eitzel. But what? “I think you’re a freaking genius?” or, “Thank you for just being?” LOL.

         As an author who’s still building a career, I love to hear from and talk with readers. It’s pure delight to hear that your book gave someone a few hours of pleasure. So I’m getting a little better at overcoming the shyness-in-the-face-of-icons thing, but I’m still working at it. At my very first Literacy Signing a few years ago in Dallas, I saw Jayne Ann Krentz, so I took a deep breath, thrust a copy of THE RUNAWAY DUKE into her hand as a gift, babbled something breathlessly and then, I think, I basically fled. It’s all kind of a blur now. I do remember leaving her gazing down at my book in a sort of bemusement. LOL. And JAK and I now have the same agent, believe it or not. Still, I’m pretty positive I wouldn’t exactly relax in her presence instantly should we meet again tomorrow.

         I think I would like to be an icon someday. And even then, I still want to have icons of my own. People who make me babble or feel shy.

         Have any of you guys had a chance to meet your idols? What was it like? Do you want to meet your idol, if you haven’t? What would you say? Do you think Springsteen had a point—that knowing someone personally might affect the pleasure you take in their work?

Comments

[Danny]

Big congrats Ranurgis & Tammi!

[Ranurgis]

Thanks, Julie. What a nice surprise. I'm looking forward to the book. I'll read the blog later.

This has been a cheer-up for me on a day with lots of pain and that's always so nice.

Congrats to Tammi as well. And thanks, Danny.

[Rose Lee]

Hi, Julie. I read your blog but I haven't commented yet. I live in Oregon now, but I lived in San Francisco in the 80's and 90's and i remember American Music Club. I loved them, too. Mark Eitzel was incredible. And drunk a lot of the time, too as I recall. :) My boyfriend was a big fan, and I became a fan as a result I'm shy about meeting people I idolize, too, but I think it'll get easier for you as the years go by. You're already a big star in my book. :) I love your books.

[Estella]

Congrats to the winners.
I think Springsteen was dead on!

[Cheryl S.]

Congratulations Ranurgis and Tammi!

[Diana]

I love the Great American Music Hall. Someone told me it used to be a brothel.

I've never met my idols. Once I saw Chris Isaak at Green Apple Books, but I didn't talk to him. He's not my idol, though.

Diana

[Diana]

Congratulations, Ranurgis and Tammi.

Diana

[Julie Anne Long]

Hi Rose! You're very kind—I'm so glad you enjoy my books! And you made me laugh...oh yeah, Mark Eitzel was indeed frequently a bit, um, *toasted* onstage, in that fine rock star tradition. :) And hopefully you're right—I'll get better at the whole "meeting idols" thing as time goes by. LOL. Maybe it's healthy for all of us to have someone to look up to!

Estella—so you think Bruce had it right? Truthfully, I once met a woman whose music I really admire, but she was so unpleasant when I met her (and even before then I'd heard she wasn't exactly a peach) that I truthfully couldn't quite listen to her songs in the same way after that, even though I generally like to give people the benefit of the doubt—you never know when someone's tired, or having a bad day, or what have you.

Diana—that's funny! I once saw Chris Isaak, too—at a diner on Irving Street. I'd always wondered why this particular little diner had a big Chris Isaak poster over the grille, appropo of seemingly nothing, and then one day I saw a guy that I *thought* looked a bit like him sitting at the window table having breakfast. When he got up to leave, all the ladies behind the counter waved and trilled, "Bye Chris!" Pretty funny. Would you *like* to meet your idols someday, do you think?

[Diana]

I'm trying to think who I consider my idols. I love to listen to music and watch movies, so I guess some of my idols are musicians and actors. I really like the actor Ryan Gosling (The Notebook, The Believer, Half Nelson), and I'd be thrilled if I got to meet him. He's pretty easy on the eyes, so if I ever met him, I hope I'd remember how to speak. :P

Diana

[Kevin]

About five years ago, I met my childhood idol, Joe Montana. I am a TV journalist by trade and I had the opportunity one afternoon to meet him at a charity event in San Jose. I was glad to meet him because I admired him when he was QB'ing for the 49ers. So, when I finally had a chance, I was excited (as any thirtysomething guy could be about meeting his idol). I enjoyed the five minutes I had to interview him. That day, I told everyone that I met him. It was a great experience. I've also had the opportunity to meet others who I once considered my idols, and some, who I won't mention specifically by name, didn't quite measure up. They had a friendly, public persona on TV, but behind the camera, they were mean and not friendly. Not quite the image I had for them. In some ways, I wish that I'd never met them because their cockiness and super-ego'ish attitudes changed the way I thought about them.

[Diana]

That sucks when idols turn out to be cocky duds.

Diana

[Julie Anne Long]

Kevin, I saw Joe Montana once—I was walking to the train station from work and I saw him getting into limo outside of the Hyatt in San Francisco. He was VERY big, and VERY blonde, and somehow larger than life. Glad to know he's a nice guy. :)

And yeah, Diana, there's a risk inherent in meeting your idols, I suppose. :) I guess the trick is to appreciate their talent as something distinct from the person who owns it, if that makes sense.

[Toni Blake]

Hey Julie! And hey Diana! (Julie, I happen to know Diana - small world, huh?)

Anyhoo, intriguing topic, Ms. Long. I have indeed met one of my idols, and because I don't want to knock this person, I won't say his name. But he's a writer in an entirely different genre. The first time, I thought he was a great guy, the second time, my opinion became colored another way. As a result, I still enjoy his work, but I will admit I read it with a different eye now, which is kind of a bummer.

And I also think there's a difference between a real "idol" and someone you just dig, you know. I tend to idolize certain writers because *I'm* a writer, and so that's where my heart lies. But I also just *dig* a lot of various celebrity types ; ) And I'd be happy to meet them, but would probably trip over myself because I am, for some reason, greatly stymied by true fame. Any time I come remotely close to a truly famous person, I generally do something idiotic, then run away ; )

Person I would most like to meet right now: Criss Angel. Why? Because he's hot ; ) And also because I think he's extremely driven and talented and I admire his work ethic.

Person I just missed meeting recently: Get this. My husband stopped in to a local sandwich shop about a month ago and found out Johnny Depp had just been there! In freaking northern Kentucky, of all places! Signed a plate and everything. They said he pulled in by himself in a Mercedes, order a sandwich, signed a plate, and departed. And okay, so I didn't JUST miss meeting him since I was at home working. But when you live in Kentucky, having Johnny Depp a mile from your house, right next door to your dry cleaners, feels like a near miss ; )

Person my best friend just encountered: My best friend just went on a Disney cruise with her family. Slash from Guns 'n' Roses was there! With *his* family. She saw him all over the place (hard to miss, I guess) and passed within a few inches of him when she was leaving the spa and he was going in. She said he came to character breakfasts to get Mickey's autograph for his kid and all that stuff. He didn't wear the big black hat, though ; )

[Julie Anne Long]

Look! It's my buddy Toni!! Yay!! (Ms. Blake is a *wonderful* writer, and has very good fashion sense, and what more can one ask from one's friends?? LOL.) Have to wonder what Johnny Depp was doing in that sandwich shop (apart from getting lunch and signing plates. LOL). Are you sure you all weren't just dreaming?? And I love your story about Slash—how sweet is that?? LOL. I heard another story about him, and I haven't the faintest idea whether it's true or not, but it endeared me to him forever: he was playing a New Year's Eve show somewhere, I believe, but then he got a call from home telling him his beloved cat was sick, and he spent all of New Year's eve next to the phone waiting for news about his cat. LOL. Seems a far cry from that sinewy bad boy in the Paradise City video. Who knows? Perhaps Reformed Rockers make the best family men. :) (a slight variation on our "Reformed Rakes" theme, you see.)

[Dena]

Congrats ladies

I haven't met my idols but not sure what I would do if I ever did,probably be a bit quiet and afterwards be pissed because I should have done/said more,lol.

[Benji]

I met Lassie one day. It was fun. But, he's a little too smart for me, the showoff.

[Julie Anne Long]

Hey Dena—who are a few of your idols? I always love to hear who people admire!

And Benji—are you sure you aren't just a wee bit envious of Lassie's long, flowing hair and very distinguished career in both film and television? You should be proud of your accomplishments, too. Even though you're very small. And inordinately hairy. (Enjoyed your website, btw. And "Benji Off the Leash" was a tour de force.)

[Diana]

Toni, it's nice to see you posting here. Toni and I share a love for the soap opera "All My Children" and a strapping lad on the show. ;)

Criss Angel was supposedly spotted with actress Minnie Driver, according to a magazine I read recently. :P

Diana

[Toni Blake]

What? Minnie Driver! This is an outrage!

Okay, calming down now. But that pairing is just not working for me ; ) I really thought he had a thing going with the blond chick who's on his show a lot, popping up out of bags and from behind blankets and whatnot. Anyhoo, thanks for the scoop, Diana, even if I don't approve ; )

Okay, and this is perfect for a discussion about idols. Diana recently met Cameron Mathison of All my Children, and she knew he'd been on one of my early book covers and that I watched the show every day forever, and do you know what she did? She asked him to hold up a little sign that says HI TONI! and took a picture of him! And told him about me requesting him for my cover, etc. Is that not sweet, or what? It's going in my next newsletter, and Diana rocks. Oh, and Diana, forgot to tell you - finally got to give my mom a copy of the pic yesterday, and she was quite delighted, as I knew she would be : )

Julie, thanks for the warm welcome to your blog : ) And for the kind compliments about my writing : ) I'm quite fond of Ms. Long's writing, too! But before this becomes The Julie and Toni Show ... that IS a sweet story about Slash!

As for Johnny Depp, okay, I didn't see him. But I really think he was there! I've actually heard he comes to this area sometimes for some reason. (I know "I've heard" and "for some reason" do not sound exactly concrete, but it's all I got ; )) He was actually born in Kentucky, you know. But he left at a young age. Some people seem to think he still has ties here from his youth, but I'm wagering not, since I believe he really did more of his growing up in Florida. Can you tell I like Cap'n Jack Sparrow just a little?

Hey Benji - arf.

[Julie Anne Long]

Diana, now that's a true fan!! I can't wait to see that photo. And Toni, I didn't know it was *possible* to request specific men for covers. LOL. This opens up a *magnificent* world of possibilities.

[Haven Rich]

Well, I have met a few of my idols...Julia Quinn, Teresa Medeiros, Lisa Kleypas, Christina Dodd...umm lets make this short, if I have a photo of them with me on my website, they are my idol.

As for ones I haven't met yet..you, Elizabeth Boyle, Jenna Petersen, Sari Robins. There are more but space being what it is and all lol.

When I first met a few of them, I was babbling, I'm sure!! Now since I chat with most of them on a day-to-day thing, I'm much more at ease.

So Julie, when I meet you forgive my passing out and drool haha.

[Diana]

Julie, here's the photo I took of Toni's hunk, Cameron Mathison, and his co-star, Alicia Minshew (Ryan and Kendall on "All My Children") saying hi to Toni. :)

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid212/p5483f939bcf3a99591e4c2fe578ed1f0/ed5a2fd0.jpg

Diana

[Julie Anne Long]

Haven, you goose! No passing out or drooling allowed when you meet me! But feel free to babble, because I'll likely be babbling, too. :)

Ah, Diana, Toni...I very much see your point with regards to Mr. Cameron Mathison. Holy—! That man is...words elude me. LOL. "So fine" will have to do in the absence of eloquence.

Truthfully, my dream man right now is Hugh Laurie as Dr. House, but I'm having trouble picturing Dr. House sprawling over satin sheets or clutching a maiden. (Just watch: I'll have some sort of dream *just* like that tonight.)

[Diana]

I saw Hugh Laurie on "Ellen" yesterday, and he is so charming. His British accent is great, too.

Diana

[Julie Anne Long]

I would have loved to have seen that show, Diana!! For me, Hugh Laurie has the whole package. He's intelligent and quick and witty and self-deprecating and outrageously talented (he plays piano, he's written a book, he can act rings around most people by just *standing* there), and his eyes are soooooo beautiful. Also, the British accent doesn't hurt ONE bit. :) It's funny, but to me he's someone who's really grown into his looks, now that he's a little older than he was when he was, say, playing Bertie Wooster. His face looks a little lived-in, and I love it. (((Sigh)))